Sketches by Aleksey

Posted on | February 11, 2010 | Comments Off on Sketches by Aleksey

Thanks to Aleksey Nelipa for these sketches of me performing at All Asia tonight! I especially like how he captured my boot-cut jeans in the second one.

Category: Performance

I will never play another open mic as long as I live

Posted on | February 9, 2010 | 4 Comments

I used to think I had stage fright. Now I know: I have open-mic fright. There is something so intimidating about being in a room full of extraordinarily talented people, waiting for hours to play your two songs and then get off the stage in a rush. And when you fuck up, it hurts double, because it’s just an open mic, and nobody cares, so you care MORE because it seems twice as pathetic to fuck up there.

This was the scene at the Lizard Lounge open mic competition tonight. After making the finals last week in my first attempt, I botched my finals song, forgetting the chords, and then completely forgetting the final verse. But I went back tonight thinking I was a shoe-in. I got there at 7:00 to get an alternate slot. But tonight was no ordinary night. The place was LOADED with talent, and many of them are not newcomers to the field.

So I went on late and played a new song called “Blow” and COMPLETELY, IRREVOCABLY, UNFORGIVINGLY BOTCHED IT. I transposed lyrics, forgot others, sang it horribly, and worst of all, kept having to stop. I must have stopped four times within the course of two verses. To the audience, it probably seemed amusing. I certainly did my best to make it seem funny. But inside it felt AWFUL. It is public humiliation. It is abject, prostrating FAILURE. And coming off the stage, I felt I had the stink of disease on me — like no one wanted to touch the festering corpse.

Six hours sitting in this place feeling nervous, and I end the night with THAT. No thank you. When I play my own shows this does not happen. I have FUN.

So that’s it. Never again. No more open mics. I get too nervous. They totally wreck my confidence.

Good night.

Category: Performance
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I just don't get Wilco

Posted on | February 7, 2010 | 1 Comment

The media has such a big boner for Wilco. The blogs, the critics, the magazines… They’ve won five Grammies! (Not that this means shit, but still…I’d take a Grammy, well one of the good ones anyway…I might use the “Best Album Notes” as a dog food bowl).

I’ve tried and tried to find something to like in Wilco’s music. I’ve listened to old stuff and new stuff at length (thank you Lala.com). So far I’ve found only one song worth more than a single listen: Heavy Metal Drummer.

I certainly appreciate the musicianship, their consistency, their proficiency in songwriting, Jeff Tweedy’s tenacity through the years, and their help in creating this new genre (which I think is now called Americana, but that may have changed in the last twenty or so minutes). And maybe that’s all it takes to be thought of as a good band. They are solid, if uninspiring.

But Tweedy’s singing just always seems so unspirited, and come to think of it, so does the guitar playing. The lyrics are okay but basically inoffensive and bland.

And I struggle to chalk this up to taste. For example, I don’t really like The Flaming Lips, but I totally see the appeal of this music.

Is there something wrong with me? I want to like Wilco. But I just don’t get it. In fact, I’ve talked to others about this and everybody seems to feel the same way. Can anyone tell me what’s so great about them? I’m serious. I want to know. I feel left out.

Category: Bands
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Heidi Montag Sells More Albums Than I Do

Posted on | February 3, 2010 | Comments Off on Heidi Montag Sells More Albums Than I Do

According to Soundscan, Heidi Montag’s new album, Superficial, sold only 658 copies in its first week of release. They say that like it’s a bad thing. The girl “bankrupted” herself to finance this album, spending, as she claims, almost $2 million to make it. So, if I have my math right, and you assume most of those purchases were through iTunes which takes a $3 cut, she has made a return that is statistically insignificant from a flatbed trailer of miscellaneous excrements.

By contrast, I produced grateful/disorder for $0, which is almost $2 million less than almost $2 million. I used equipment I already owned, performed everything myself, and mixed it with free software. If you add in distribution, it cost me $35. The most expensive part was having CDs printed so I can sell them at shows. So you might say I turned a profit on my first album sale. (You might also not say this).

Who knew I could be a better businessman than Heidi Montag? And all thanks to the books at my local library.

Category: Music I Hate, Uncategorized
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First STETSON sighting captured on video

Posted on | February 2, 2010 | Comments Off on First STETSON sighting captured on video

Thanks to Lillian for the capture. I encourage fans to utilize all that great technology built into their pockets while at my shows.

January 13th – Bloc 11 in Somerville, MA.

Category: video
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STETSON moved to the basement

Posted on | February 2, 2010 | Comments Off on STETSON moved to the basement

For anybody coming out to see me Tuesday night at Tommy Doyle’s, the “Loft” upstairs has been rented out for a Harvard party, so we’ll be in the basement. I’m not sure how I feel about this but we’ll see.

My drummer, Ariel Bernstein, will be joining me on djembe for a few numbers, so there’s that.

Category: Performance

There Are Too Many Bands

Posted on | January 31, 2010 | Comments Off on There Are Too Many Bands

There are. Join me in a rampage and we’ll take a few of them down.

Then off ourselves…

Category: Personal Thoughts

New Song: "The Salmon"

Posted on | January 29, 2010 | Comments Off on New Song: "The Salmon"

Just completed the first recorded version of “The Salmon”. It’s still a bit messy and I’ll probably add some soft drums later but I wanted to get something up before month-end so here it is. Use the player at right to hear it.

Category: New Songs

"Awesome" is dead. You killed it.

Posted on | January 29, 2010 | Comments Off on "Awesome" is dead. You killed it.

Stop saying this word all the time. Everything is not so awesome as you keep claiming it is.

Category: It's Dead, You Killed It
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Younger, Better-Looking People With Better Ideas and More Talent

Posted on | January 28, 2010 | 1 Comment

The Tallest Man on EarthI’d tell you I’m losing my edge, but I never had one to lose.

I am only the picture of fear and insecurity as I continue my ceaseless journey into the wilderness that is the music industry.

My latest anti-hero? The Tallest Man on Earth (aka Kristian Matsson). He is younger, better-looking, sings as well or better, and plays the guitar a thousand times better than I. He already toured with Bon Iver. He’s only been on the scene a few years and people are already dropping Dylan Quarters around him.  Look at this gushing post on him on The Tripwire. How will I ever compete with this guy? (Although, ironically, I’m probably taller than him.)

I don’t know what I’m doing and nobody has ever heard of me. I’m not sure my music’s any good. And I’m not crazy enough to walk around with a gigantic ego like many of these people. This is nothing but self-mutilation.

Maybe I should stop listening to music altogether.

Category: ...that makes me hate myself
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