On Dealing With the Low Points and Alone Points

Posted on | February 15, 2010 | Comments Off on On Dealing With the Low Points and Alone Points

There are many times in our lives when we find ourselves at an emotional low point. Or perhaps, shall we say, a lonely point. It’s all relative, of course, but you know it when you feel it.

A strategy I often deploy is, “keep your feet moving.” My theory is that every low point is temporary, unless you happen to die in the middle of one. And perhaps our minds are too overwhelmed with grief, sadness, confusion, or even terror, to do much of anything. You can’t make your mind move, maybe, but you can surely make your feet move. This can be all you need — to go for a walk, to get some exercise, to run an errand, to clean your apartment — anything besides sitting there moping.

I came up with this idea in response to a different problem while in college. Socially maladjusted to the point that I was clueless at parties and dating, but desperate, I began simply asking out the most attractive girls on campus, none of whom even knew me. It was a juvenile and desperate strategy, and the only way to pull it off was to move my feet, because my mind withered at the thought of doing anything so bold. I could force myself, however, to walk in the girl’s direction, and at some point I would be standing right in front of them, and then I would have to say something or look like a fool. The strategy worked, to a point. I did get a few dates this way, to the envy of my friends, but then I still had to deal with my complete fear and awkwardness, so suffice to say there were no second dates.

Maybe it’s a shit strategy. It certainly doesn’t make me feel any better. But at least I wake up and my bedroom is tidy and there’s food in the fridge. That’s something.